First Post Day 14

This is my first post and first blog at that. I figured it'd be a nice way for me and others to remember this long journey I'm going on and of course Elder Sweets journey too. I'll keep everyone updated on how he's doing, any news I get and just my emotional journey so I guess I'll begin now.

The last 14 days have been an emotional rollercoaster! Talk about being bi polar. Saying goodbye at the airport was a lot easier than I thought itd be..the night before when he dropped me off at my house for the first time with his mom in the car..since he couldn't be alone with me, not as easy. I thought I'd never stop crying as all he could do was give me a handshake and not comfort me by holding me as he did so many times before. I got in my room and thought of all the ways I could get him to stay. I knew he had to go and that it was the right thing to do but a girl never wants to lose her bestfriend and boy she loves. The next 14 days would be a lot easier with the support of family, especially his, they are the best I couldn't ask for more. Being at his house was without him there proved to be too hard and stopped going after the first 3 days. I went on with my day to day life trying to stay as busy as I possibly could. I got my first letter last Tuesday and was NOT expecting it and I wasn't even at home so I was daying! I was so happy to get it I forgot how happy I could really be and I remembered he is my reason for being happy and knew right then and there I never wanted to be with anyone else. I knew already but this just reassured all my feelings. I got another the next day and then another that Friday. These 2 not bearing such great news finding out that he wasn't having a good time and wanted to come home. It broke my heart to hear these things knowing that I could do NOTHING to help and even harder for me to support him being out there when all I want is for him to be here with me but I continued to support him and give him my love from afar. I've learned I have a new family the MGs on facebook, I don't know where I'd be without them and love them all as my family and have already made some great friends. These last 2 days have been the hardest, yesterday I cried more than I knew possible as I realized his clothes stopped smelling like him and hitting the realization that he's actually gone and that I've gone 14 days without him and I never thought that possible. I miss him more than ever but my love grows strong. My favorite time has become bedtime when I feel closest to him. I put on his clothes, spray his cologne get comfy under the blanket he gave me (his favorite blanket his grandma made him when he was little), write in my journal, read the Book of Mormon, pray then cuddle up with the bear he got me pretending its him. I've dreamt about him everynight and I love that I can feel like I'm with him if only for a while. That's pretty much a summary of these last 14 days..2 weeks actually I can't believe it. Its true days feel like weeks and weeks feel like days. Although these 14 days have flown by they also seem like they've been a lot longer than 2 weeks and I'm looking the next 2 years dead on and it's intimidating and scary. The unknown is what scares me the most but Curtis leaving has brought me closer to the Lord than I could have ever imagined and my love has only grown I know I can make it..I WILL make it!